Over at the other site, Wafa posted this … after waking up from a restless sleep reading what she’s written made me cry. Here it goes …
” Wena has always appeared delicate and childish. She giggles and laughs at the silliest things and like me, decision making is often painstaking. I think we should both get a book on how to be decisive but then again we wouldn’t be able to decide which book it would be. Behind the facade of merriment though is a deep sadness and pain that have just become more obvious to everyone recently. What’s not so obvious is the amount of courage and strength she has. The past few days made me realize that her fortitude is greater than most people.
I don’t like sad events and tear jerking moments so as much as possible I steer clear of that with her. I try to make her smile and laugh as much as I could if only for a moment. I see no sense in talking about it since talking makes you remember and remembering hurts like hell. I don’t talk to her about it and knowing her, she wouldn’t want any unsolicited probing. So this is my way of letting her know that she’s one of the bravest persons I know. I’m proud of how she’s grown in a matter of days, proud of how she’s taking care of herself and that I’m always here even if I have dada.
Life has a way of bringing out the divine power of the human spirit so that we can carry on during times of great pain and loss. It is that spine that we never thought we got. Like a reservoir of untapped energy just waiting for the time when our regular everyday energy fails us. At least we have time as our ally, time heals all wounds till it will no longer hurt.
Wena there are a number of us who care and love you, you won’t be alone ever!”
Someone asked me how I am … I didn’t know what to say. This is the very question which would procur so many emotions I can barely count and can barely name … to say am okay is a lie but I do say it for the heck of answering the question and to set the person asking at ease, am broken … I was unhappy before … now I know a part of me is dying.
I guess they’ll never understand, they havent lost the center of their universe, the same way I’ve lost mine.